The Queen's English
Fine in the Commonwealth, Foreign in the U.S.
Alagi Yorro Jallow, MPA/MC
Issue date: 12/6/07 Section: Op-Ed
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Africans who have lived in the States often tell tales about America. They rave of sleek roads and the fact that one never has to line up at an ATM. They brag about pimped-out cars and 24-hour supermarkets. But one thing is always left out of the rosy picture: British vernacular is useless the moment we cross the Atlantic.
Learning the Queen's English in school gives us a good start, but it does not mean we are set for the rest of our globetrotting days. Americans have invented their own dialect, which many of us have to learn the hard way.
You can have a craving for chips when you arrive in the States, but you'll never get them unless you refer to them as French fries. Chips here are what we call potato crisps in The Gambia. Your car ceases to have a bonnet. Here, it is a hood, and what you know as the boot is now the trunk.
This country has even renamed its games. The most popular, American football, seems more like rugby than soccer. It is a rough game played by burly men, just like rugby. However, unlike rugby, these men have taken every precaution to make sure they don't mess up their pretty faces. They wear heavy helmets, mouth guards, kneepads, big shoes and heavy-duty uniforms. Still, one can't help but wonder: shouldn't they call it rugby?
Even words that have the same meaning are spelled differently. No one in the States writes a cheque, they write a check. Those black rubbery things that make your car move may be tyres in The Gambia, but they are tires here.
I've had a lot of embarrassing collisions on this cultural road, but none as horrifying as the day I asked my sixty-something ethics professor for a "rubber" not long ago.
The whole room went deathly silent. I looked around, wondering why even the loudest bullies in class seemed speechless all of a sudden. What I did not know was that I had just asked a man who is old enough to be my grandpa for a condom. What we call a rubber in The Gambia is an eraser in the States.
Needless to say, I now carry a pencil with a big eraser in my bag.
The moment you leave The Gambia, you adopt a second culture that you switch in and out of depending on where you are. You learn how to look Americans straight in the eyes when you talk to them, because if you don't, they assume you are lying. When you come to The Gambia, you try not to do that or folks will think you are being defiant.
Americans don't shy away from talking about their lives, dirty laundry and all. I once overheard a friend tell her boss that she could not make it to work the day before because her boyfriend had just broken up with her and she was too distressed. The boss sympathized and told her not to worry. Try that excuse on your Gambian boss, and he'll look at you like you are psychotic.
Then there are American customs. When someone invites you to eat, you better have money if you take him or her up on the offer. It does not mean you are getting a free meal - it just means they would like to enjoy your company as they chow down their food. If you would like to eat with them, you buy your own food. In The Gambia, when someone asks you to lunch, it means they are paying. Many Africans in this country have had to call someone to come pay for their meals after their invitations got lost in translation.
The list of differences is endless. More than your geography changes; your life as you know it becomes deprogrammed and reprogrammed all over again. Sometimes your Britishisms will pop up and embarrass the heck out of you. Other times you will get so confused, you won't know who you are anymore.
But as long you as never ask anyone for a "rubber," you should be okay.
Learning the Queen's English in school gives us a good start, but it does not mean we are set for the rest of our globetrotting days. Americans have invented their own dialect, which many of us have to learn the hard way.
You can have a craving for chips when you arrive in the States, but you'll never get them unless you refer to them as French fries. Chips here are what we call potato crisps in The Gambia. Your car ceases to have a bonnet. Here, it is a hood, and what you know as the boot is now the trunk.
This country has even renamed its games. The most popular, American football, seems more like rugby than soccer. It is a rough game played by burly men, just like rugby. However, unlike rugby, these men have taken every precaution to make sure they don't mess up their pretty faces. They wear heavy helmets, mouth guards, kneepads, big shoes and heavy-duty uniforms. Still, one can't help but wonder: shouldn't they call it rugby?
Even words that have the same meaning are spelled differently. No one in the States writes a cheque, they write a check. Those black rubbery things that make your car move may be tyres in The Gambia, but they are tires here.
I've had a lot of embarrassing collisions on this cultural road, but none as horrifying as the day I asked my sixty-something ethics professor for a "rubber" not long ago.
The whole room went deathly silent. I looked around, wondering why even the loudest bullies in class seemed speechless all of a sudden. What I did not know was that I had just asked a man who is old enough to be my grandpa for a condom. What we call a rubber in The Gambia is an eraser in the States.
Needless to say, I now carry a pencil with a big eraser in my bag.
The moment you leave The Gambia, you adopt a second culture that you switch in and out of depending on where you are. You learn how to look Americans straight in the eyes when you talk to them, because if you don't, they assume you are lying. When you come to The Gambia, you try not to do that or folks will think you are being defiant.
Americans don't shy away from talking about their lives, dirty laundry and all. I once overheard a friend tell her boss that she could not make it to work the day before because her boyfriend had just broken up with her and she was too distressed. The boss sympathized and told her not to worry. Try that excuse on your Gambian boss, and he'll look at you like you are psychotic.
Then there are American customs. When someone invites you to eat, you better have money if you take him or her up on the offer. It does not mean you are getting a free meal - it just means they would like to enjoy your company as they chow down their food. If you would like to eat with them, you buy your own food. In The Gambia, when someone asks you to lunch, it means they are paying. Many Africans in this country have had to call someone to come pay for their meals after their invitations got lost in translation.
The list of differences is endless. More than your geography changes; your life as you know it becomes deprogrammed and reprogrammed all over again. Sometimes your Britishisms will pop up and embarrass the heck out of you. Other times you will get so confused, you won't know who you are anymore.
But as long you as never ask anyone for a "rubber," you should be okay.
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